Is mama happy? Is mama proud of the walking trigger warning she unwittingly shat out and wiped against the grain, this shit stain: the college conservative? A turd slowly sliding down the puppet master’s strings. The right-wing is coming, and they’re back with a vengeance. The incels and the fratboys love their president. Reform your campus! Make America Great Again! Can I get a “market-friendly” and can I get an amen? You play to old scripts for dumb pricks, fell too hard for the grift. More Jacob Wohl than Ben Shapiro, maybe you should just enlist. Submission is your business, business is always good. You lick the boot enough, you might get to the foot. (Wowee!) Where pathology ends and politicking begins may be well up for grabs, but the party platform’s a blast: Every worker a slave, every woman the same, the common good can’t be saved, you’re gonna get it. Until the planet is cooked for the company books, bankrolling all of the crooks, you’re gonna get it. White ethnocracy now, once you’re good and bailed out, never wondering how you’re gonna get it. All alternatives crushed, our prospects are flushed, no getting’s ever enough, you’re gonna get it. Do you need a safe space? Do tears fall in your boxcars when your worldview is shattered by your first-year seminar? The straight white manchild sieg heils, the inconsolable victim. But he’s getting what he wants and our future is grim. So forgive my indifference, your “exchange of ideals'' might mean new horizons on a rock strip-mined of life.
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